What should we say or not say in communicating with the birth parents?

When Adoptive Parents meet and interact with Birth Parents, it is important to remember that these meetings are designed so that both parties can get to know each other. The best advice we can offer is to be yourself. If the plan is a Closed Adoption, it is important that Adoptive Parents and Birth Parents remember not to disclose any information or details which might disclose identities. It is always a good idea to show empathy for the Birth Parent’s situation and for Birth Mother’s health and wellbeing, but do not interrogate or ask for personal information, which may alienate her. Instead, if you have questions on social and personal history or medical matters, let us know, and we will handle that for you.